I don't want to jinx tings (as if I could, though I have a slight fear things could go bad again and I'll feel stupid writing this) but I'm feeling much better - maybe you can chalk it up to the caffeine which I caved in and started drinking again. I've been writing more lately, you've (assuming you're a regular reader to read this) read some of it, and a large portion of the rest is material for my independent study which I've made good progress in.
I've also watched this video which I find very uplifting: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDTObha5lUE Despite my disagreements with Hitchens I believe he was in some ways a kindred spirit. And anyone who knows the exhilaration of pursuing knowledge or reasoning is at-least in that very crucial way a virtuous human being.
I want people to know that though I may disagree with one stance or another that as long as someone genuinely is decent and is trying to make the world a better place than they've left it then they're (to some extent) okay in my book. Regardless of their levels of intelligence human beings have a remarkable ability to detect this sincere eagerness and devotion to helping others, and knows when it is lacking. It is this emotional intelligence (if it is to be called that) that makes people distrust politicians, leaders and generally insincere people who are at-least somewhat dishonest in their motives. We know that it's not simply a matter of factual disagreement whether we have food share or public housing or not. Some people want to help others - and some people don't give a shit or actually believe the poor deserve to suffer. Now there are some RW Libertarians who actually believe that all government policies create more suffering than it cures, but those who have this notion as primal are few and far between and we know damn-well that fundamentally they are egoists (or deontologists of a sort) and don't give a shit about others. They just don't. Look at their primary ethical arguments. Rand, Nozick, Friedman. All of them believe a business has a moral obligation (if any) to the stockholder/investor and not their fellow human beings. It's disgusting. Hitchens may have been loosely speaking a Conservative but never of that extreme sort. Anyway, this isn't even really about him, just that I believe moral psychology is more important than opinion. There's a lot of good people of faith out there who deserve in some regard my admiration for their eagerness to help aid human beings suffering. I just wish they would be more open-minded and value the things that Hitchens and I do. Not saying they are simply from disagreeing with me, but I think most honest people know from experience how the large-sum of religious people are in the intellectual rigor/open-mindedness department.
Whoo... didn't expect to type all that. Anyway, take care everyone. I hope, especially if you're currently down, that you get an upswing similar to mine. I won't lie and promise things will be alright - because much of the time they aren't - but if you hang in there and work on what inspires you (and get hopped up on caffeine) you can feel beautiful things that make you eager to love others. It's this beautiful feeling that we need more of.